Q: How do you get a blonde out of a tree? A: Throw a moneky at her

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Why did Susie fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Why did Susie drown? Because she fell in a puddle. Knock knock Who's there Not Suzy!

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how many milkshakes does it take to bring all the boys to the yard?

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How do you get a one-armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

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a cow walked into a bar and asked for a large whiskey on the rocks, 'long day, eh' said the barman, 'yes' replied the cow, 'first a large moving obstical was cutting down my food, and then my friend was raped from his milk.'

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Why can't Scrillex fish? Because He is too busy to practice fishing.

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What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

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XD, You must really like me Nero, do you think people have problems telling us apart here?

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roses are red, violets are blue, get on your knees ho, and stick to me like glue.

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How do you keep children off your lawn? Touch them.

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So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

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How are Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga similar? They are both men except Justin Beiber

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What colour is an orange? Orange. What did you expect?

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Cole likes to trim jaycie's butt pubes

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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you know why they're called ear wigs, right? cause they go in your ears! then they wig out? no, they kill you.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

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Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

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What's the difference between a black man and a orange? One is a fruit and other isn't

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Knock Knock Who's There? Children Protective Services. Your kids are dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it looking for food for it was starving to death.

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A man and a six year old boy are walking along a path through the woods on a moonless night. "Gee mister, I'm scared!" says the boy. "You're scared?" says the man. "I have to walk back alone!"

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Why did octopus cross the road? Because the road was underwater

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''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops