Rose are brown, Violets are brown, Who keeps pooping in my garden?

thumb_up thumb_down

If gluttony is a serious sin, why are so many Christians fat? Because they have bad eating habits.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: what did the old man do to the little boy in his dark cellar while babysitting on a stormy night? A: told him to hold a flashlight because the power went out and he needed to find his electric generator.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a man with a Club approaching a Seal Very Strong considering he can hold a building

thumb_up thumb_down

Dislike this joke for a cookie However if you like this joke you dont get a cookie

thumb_up thumb_down

LET'S PLAY CARDS SHUFFLE THE DECK *person with a deck-patio* no please don't

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom.

thumb_up thumb_down

How many Lepers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? People with leprosy should not be doing general house keeping.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did Steve Hagen say to Steve Walters? "We have the same first name."

thumb_up thumb_down

A barman walks into a bar. He works there.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was the girl crying when she got home? She got raped and mugged on the walk home

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red Grass is green Get in the van If you know what I mean

thumb_up thumb_down

Cripples are lame.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't so much cross the road as he did go down the road, to the supermarket, where he was sold to a family of 5, and taken down yet another road to the family's house, where they enjoyed a nice family dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why Is Billy So Dumb? He Didin't Pass School

thumb_up thumb_down

Six hats walk out of a garden. When mustard offal fruit paps.

thumb_up thumb_down

what do you call a black drug dealer? A pharmacist.

thumb_up thumb_down

Where does Charlie Sheen Shop? Winners

thumb_up thumb_down

Why wad six afraid of seven? Because seven was a sexual offender.

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the ghost say to the black man? nothing. He just shot him.

thumb_up thumb_down

Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: ‘In silence.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops