"Hey ask me if i'm fat" "Are you fat" "Leave me alone"

How was the copper wire invented? 2 Jews pulling on the same penny!

An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

Q; Whats the hardest part about nailing a dead baby to a wall? A; my dick while doing it.

Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

What do you call a blonde who can't read? an infant

Why can't dogs fly? Because they do not have wings.

Stripper went to strip club to ask for work. - It was closed

did you hear the joke about the vagina ....... you'll never get it

Q: Did you hear about the fire at the circus? A: It was in tents!

Q: What do you call a pair of dead babies lying on the ground? A: Slippers

Did you ever notice how Bill Nye has a "labrotory" filled with young innocent children? hmmm, very suspicious!

Knock knock. After 1 and a half minutes of waiting, Phil assumes his friend is not home, and promptly leaves.

A man dies from a cat attack. he goes up to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter asks him, " how did you die sir?" The man doesn't reply so Peter says, "cat got your tongue?" "No," he says, "cat got my throat!"

Knock Knock Who's there Your serial killer

A man walks into a bar He's an alcoholic and it's ruining his family

KONY 2012! *world rises up cheering in spontaneous patriotism for Africa* Leader of KONY 2012 arrested for public masturbation

If i was given a penny every time i hear "It's not my fault". I will have the money equal to the nominal price multiplied by the count of times i heard that phrase.

When Chuck Norris claps, his two hands slam together, creating rather loud soud.

Why did the Mexican fall off of a cliff? He lost is ballence.

What's awesome that's awesome that squirts out of a bottle? Ketchup What else is awesome that squirts out of a bottle? Mustard

What's worse than having a retarded baby? Not having a baby

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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