;( ;( ANTIJOKE Write Your Own --------------------------------------------------------- It's easy to take part, just type your text below! Enter the following: I AM NOT A HUMAN Your Answer SOLVE media I AM NOT A HUMAN I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service Submit

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A horse trots into a bar. He is left with a bump on his head.

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What is dull and has no point? A pencil without its point

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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There was a cat and a copy cat. the regular cat jumped off a cliff. How many cats are left? 2 Cats have 9 lives!!!

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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What's big and purple? Barney

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Why was the black man eating fried chicken? He was on death row and it was his last meal request..

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Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Yes, it's actually very nice.

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What do you do when you're given a phonebook? You ask for their name.

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after being hit by a train.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause Magic Johnson has AIDS

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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You know what's natural? Bears.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller watch TV? Because at 19 months she contracted what is believed to be scarlet fever which caused an acute congestion of the stomach and brain which caused her to loose sight and hearing.

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Why did the girl eat a sandwich? because she was thirsty

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go F*** yourself

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what do you call a black who stabbed your entire family? it all depends on what his name happens to be

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Miley Cyrus Walked into a fence and fainted.

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Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet up with his friend that was on the other side.

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what would be the most epic fight ever chuck norris vs superman vs all legendary pokemon vs a giant who would win it me (im superman)

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Roses are red, violets are blue, take this medication, and call me if you have any symptoms of nausea or heartburn.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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