What's the best way to piss off a feminist? R@pe her.

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Man 1: is that boy high? Man 2: No. He has down syndrome

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What's the hardest thing about eating a quadriplegic? The wheelchair.

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Why does Mario grown on shrooms? Because they bloom inside of him.

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Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

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What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

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Three Black men smash windows to enter a house. They're firemen and are rescuing a young child...

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what's white, got three legs and you wouldn't expect to find in the rainforest? A fridge on a stool

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Rain rain go away, and don't come back or else i will kill your family.

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What's black and red? I black guy bleeding to death

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What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Daisies are red. WHY IS MY GARDEN ON FIRE?

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Q: Why did the man cross the road? A: Cause he felt like it.

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why did the clown fall of the swing? he got shot in the head

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cock in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

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A blind man walks into a book store. He asks if they have any books in Braille. The employee says "Yes! Many you haven't even seen before!"

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2 penguins in a tub. one looks to the other an says, "pass the bar of soap." the other looks at him.."what do you think i am, a typewriter?"

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Chicken

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I rode in to town on an ass... ur momas ass!!

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If Michelle rides her bike at 15 mph for 20 minutes and Erik rides his bike at 20 mph for 12 minutes, why is Michelle not in the kitchen?

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Did you hear that Jerry Sandusky won the swimming race? He's in very good shape for a man his age.

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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