How did the mouse die It was eaten by a cat How did the cat die It jumped into the bathtub and drowned

What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A cigarette that is or has been damp so that the nicotine was able to bleed into the paper and dye it.

Knock Knock!! Who's there? The Bailiffs, now get out.

WANNA HERE A JOKE? (no, i purposely clicked in this joke website to simply here to fulfill my demonic internet pleasures.)

What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? A cereal killer.

How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

Q Why did the chicken cross the road A Nobody knows why because nobody is psych

My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

Brain fart

What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

There is a very old lady at the bottom of a long flight of steep stairs with a large amount of groceries piled up in her hands. How did she make it to the top?? She walked.

One man walks on a bridge, another man sees him but doesn't really care about him.

jeanna:fu** jack:did u just say fu** jeanna:jew? jack:fu** u jew

How do you fit 10 babies in a bowl? With a blender. How do you get them out of the bowl? You don't, you've already been arrested for multiple cases of infanticide.

You are in a room with no doors and no windows. All you have a chainsaw and a mirror. How do you get out? You don't and will slowly die a painful death of asphyxiation.

if you don't like this you're gay

A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

how do you make a boy cry you cut out his eyes

What do you call a black man driving a nice luxury sedan? A man who has, surprisingly, done very well in this economy.

What do a priest, a rabbi, and an asian have in common? They all don't know each other.

Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...