Whats funnier than 24. ... DEEZ NUTS.

So you're flying around in your bathtub, how pancakes to shingle a doghouse? Airhockey, because pizza bagels can't cry.

Why did the dinosaurs become extinct? Because they wanted to.

Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

Knock knock Who's there? Banana? Knock knock Who's there? Banana Knock knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Orange you glad you don't have cancer?

roses are red violets are red everything is red who set my house on fire

What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

Where was susie after the explosion? Everywhere

What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

Why did the fat guy ride his camel to the grocery store? Because he didn't want to walk to the grocery store

What's purple, green, and orange? Dead baby with slashed floaties. What's black, purple, and orange? Same baby two weeks later.

Man 1: is that boy high? Man 2: No. He has down syndrome

Why does Mario grown on shrooms? Because they bloom inside of him.

Why did the gay man buy a prius? because it is a very fuel efficient car and will save him a lot of money of gas

Jake pulled out a gun and held it to his head, planning to fool his friends because he knew the gun was empty. Then his friend thought he was helping out his suicidal friend by stabbing him.

What's the best way to piss off a feminist? R@pe her.

What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

is this the krusty krab? no, this is patrick.

So a plane flies into a world trade centre... That's not funny

What's the hardest thing about eating a quadriplegic? The wheelchair.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is dead, and thereby lacks the necessary motor control.

Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

Three Black men smash windows to enter a house. They're firemen and are rescuing a young child...

Rain rain go away, and don't come back or else i will kill your family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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