What did Steven Hawkings say as he fell down the stairs? .................

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To men walk into a bar. One says to a paying customer, "Mind if I sit here?" and the other man inquires the bartender about so.e fancy drink that takes five minutes to prepare. After 23 minutes, naturally, they left at exactly the same time and they went home to their wife and kids. They both share a wife and kids.

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3 guys get stuck in a island and find indians and the indians say the three guys have to stick 10 of the same fruits up there or they die. The first guy came back with oranges but stops at 3 then gets killed. the second had grapes and stop at 2 and gets killed. But in heaven the first guy ask why did you stop at 2 there grapes. the second guy said he saw the third with a pineapple.

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had a good wank over anime yesterday xoxo dylan hodge

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(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

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Why did the woman come out of the kitchen? She didn't.

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People are like trees. When hit multiple times with an ax they fall down.

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Roses are blue Violets are polka dot I suck at rhyming Pandas

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Why did the woman make so many sandwiches? She was a mother catering for her child's sporting event.

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Why was the chinese man kicked out of the bar? Because he was under aged

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the lizard fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the moneky

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Chris Brown walks into a bar. And then is politely asked to leave as the bar owner also happens to be the spokesperson for an anti-domestic violence group.

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What did the hitler youth kid get for Christmas? An easy bake oven and a G.I. Jew.

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How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

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What do you call a Mexican in the sand? A churro! (not trying to be racist, I'm even Mexican)

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

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What did one Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I would tell you but i don't speak Chinese therefore i have no way of translating it for you

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A priest, a minister, and a rabbi walk into a butcher's shop. The priest and the minister each by a pound of pork while the rabbi doesn't because one of the 613 Commandments is that a Jew shall not eat any animal with hooves.

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Hello, can I order a cheeseburger?

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Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

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Why was the black man running down the street with a suitcase? He was late for work.

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A White, a Black, and a Hispanic man walk into a bar. They sit down and have a nice conversation, tip their bartender and then leave.

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How do you drown a black? - pop their lips

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is promptly arrested for sexual harassment.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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