Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

What happened when the tree fell It killed someone

does this look unsure to you?

What did the policeman say to the man accused of murder? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan.

Two guys walk into a bar, a spanish guy and a black guy. They get some drinks, call a taxi to arrive home safe. And kiss their wives and kids goodnight. They go to bed early after reading a wallstreet journal. And wake up early so they can both go to their jobs as college professors. To white kids.

Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

What do you call a group of asians? China.

How do you keep a dog from barking? Kill it.

knock knock. who's there greench greench who greenchicken feathers

What did the mother give her family for christmas? Nothing. The family is Jewish.

funniest joke ever!!!!!.....chris.

The street outside of my house is covered in jelly. I have done this.

A dyslexic pimp buys a warehouse.

what happened to the christian when he died? nothing because god isnt real.

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Gloves.

What did one duck say to the other? Well, it said "Quack" but it's not certain if it was actually addressing the other duck or if it was just making a noise in response to some other stimulus.

A penguin walks into a bar and orders a beer................ PENGUINS DON'T WALK OR TALK

Roses are red, I have a phone, nobody texts me, forever alone...

Why do black people ride Septa? Because septa is an affordable and convenient means of transportation.

a mexican is walking through the desert with no food or water, and no clothes. he'll probably die soon.

What do apples taste like? Apples.

Oh hey is your dad good at golf? No, he's not really good at anything except lying.

Two parrots are in a cage. The one looks at the other one and says, "answer the phone," and the other one says, "where are my car keys."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...