Red sky in the morning, Shepard's warning. Red sky at night, Shepard's Fulcrum.

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What do a priest, a rabbi, and an asian have in common? They all don't know each other.

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how do you make a boy cry you cut out his eyes

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What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

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What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

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What's the oppicite of brown???? Something not brown.

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why did the midget beat the basketball player in a foot race? the basketball player got bit by a scorpion and died within minutes.

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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A black man approaches a customer service desk and asks for help. He is racially discriminated and receives no help with his problem.

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roses are red violets are blue polar bears are white grass tends to be green

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how do you make a baby cry? you throw a brick at it's face!

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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What's the difference between a black person and cancer? If you don't know already, you should really question your countries education system and your parents upbringing.

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How do my feet smell? Oh wait. They can't. Feet are not sentient independent beings and therefore cannot experience the five senses, including smell.

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What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

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whats brown and sticky? whatever is coming from your pants

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What do you call a white guy? A caucasion man.

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That Rachael chick needs to get back in the kitchen

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What do you say when your hot chocolate is to hot? This hot chocolate is too hot.

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Son: i like gaming Mom: you are wasting your life *son jumps in trash can

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someone jumped off a bridge he died

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Your momma is such a slut, that she has unprotected sexual intercouse several times throughout any given day, with many different men.

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how do you make an idiot laugh? tell him a joke from antijoke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops