What is worse than being killed in a car crash? Having your girlfriend in the car with you.

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

Mack: Hello Jonathan: Hi Mack: My name is Mack, what's your name? Jonathan: My name is Billy Mack: You liar! I'm reading this post at anti-joke.com and whenever you reply, your name shows Johnathan! Johnathan: Well Mack, I guess you broke the 4th wall. By the way, this joke is over in 3, 2, 1...

KANE TUCKER HAS A CHODE THE SIZE OF HIS FINGER NAIL

An anti-Semite, a Jew and an American walked into the bar. The barman said: "Hi, Sara".

Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

Why did Bill correct Matt when he called him Jim? Because that wasn't his name.

What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

Why was the boy sad? Because a freak accident killed his mum his dad his best friend and he lost both his legs and is unable to feed himself

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

race-car = rac-ecar

A man walks into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian quickly picks out such a book and hands it to him, because to deny him the book would break the conventions of a library.

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far from its body.

Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

Bläeghen-Fassybìll-No?cheb!

How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? One second let me count them.

I woke up in bed with someone this morning. I forget why this is a joke, but your mother is a whore.

Q. What is worse than a worm in your apple? A. Hitler

Little Johnny walked into class one day. The teacher announced their would be a pop-quiz on the declaration of independence. Johnny passed. (ic3)

Why did the bald man go to hospital? Because we was getting chemotherapy

Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

two kids see a girl naked in the woods They walk away promptly to their homes and tell their mothers.

Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

Guess what! What? huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhu

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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