What was the blind man doing on the bridge? Getting struck by lightning.

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What's the best time to go to the dentist? When your tooth breaks or you need braces.

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A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

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What did I say to the joke? What? Correct.

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A man took a crap. . . . It felt amazing

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What does it take to play in the WNBA? Nothing....

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What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

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What do you call a seedless pumpkin? A pumpkin.

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bite me

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Adam eats ginger nuts the fookin chicken

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A blonde takes a test. She scores higher than her Asian friend.

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Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

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Why was the man walking down the street late at night? Because he's homeless and has nowhere to stay.

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What's the difference between an airplane and a cantaloupe? What? Wow your a dumby head.

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Why did the blonde run into a screen door? Because screen doors are difficult to see when one is running at full speed

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whats worse than getting caught by a teacher for chewing gum? getting kidnapped by a giant hawk.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Barack Obama. Ok, come on in Mr. President!

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Barbara and Martin died in their apartment. The neighbor walked in and found glass and water everywhere. How did they die? -Barbara and Martin were fish.

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Little johnny raised his hand one day in class and asked if he could use the restroom. The teacher said he had to say the abc's first. Johnny successfully recited the abc's and then proceeded to use the restroom.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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A Mexican, Asian, and a black guy are on a bridge, the Mexican says there is too much rice and throws some off the bridge, the Asian says there are too many burritos and throw some off the bridge, the Black says there are too many candles in his house and throws his car off the bridge. Everyone was happy and left besides the Black because he threw his car off.

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A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says we dont sell juice here. The jew promptly leaves, offended.

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Why did the boy trip? A small explosion in the center of the earth caused by a hobo created a tsunami, causes a seagull to fly off in alarm. The seagull lands on a Smart Car, causing it to crash, which sends a signal off to a satellite in space. Because of this, a massive earthquake occurs. Oh, and the boy? There was a bowl of soup left carelessly on the ground.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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