What do you do when you see a half-dead black man on the floor? Call an ambulance before he bleeds out causing sepsis.

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What is black and white, and red all over? I don't know that's why I was asking.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why did everyone die in the world? Its 2012.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

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Why did'nt the puppy eat it's food? Because it was made up of little bits and peices of it's family.

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Q:how do you fit 100 jews in a car? A:2 in the front 3 in the back and the other 95 in the ashtray

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Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

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You know whats funny about 9/11? Nothing.

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Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped in a van

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a black man pays his child support

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How do you kill a dumb blonde? Personally, I love stabbing them.

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Why do people waste there time writing Anti-Jokes Becuase they enjoy there right to the 1st ammendment and who are we to question it

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A guy finds a genie bottle. He rubs it. A genie appears and grant him 3 wishes. He wishes for a splendid woman, a lot of money, and a house.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had heard this joke so many times that it drove him so mad that he grabbed an ice cream, stepped into the road, and was hit by a bus, purposely adding an ironic effect to his death.

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I slept through the Dark Knight movie....turns out I was pretty tired.

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3 guys walks into a park. Which one was holding the beer? None, all 3 guys were elementary kids

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What's black and red, and covers most of your body? Fourth degree burns. You should say your goodbyes.

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What's the difference between michael jackson and casey anthony? Michael jackson's dead.

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What does A.D.D stand for? Attention deficit disorder

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What's big and green and I gets stuck in your teeth will kill you? A tractor

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What's the worst part about a plane with 500 people in it crashing? It might leave a dent in the ground.

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Lady is taking her Alzheimer grandpa to shop for his birthday. Parks, gets out and opens the door for him. He looks at her and asks? Who are you?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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