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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Three men walked into a bar. The fourth one ducked.

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

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Man: You know you're crazy when you talk to inanimate objects, you know you're Insane when they reply. Stick: I know, right?

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What has two legs but can't walk A paraplegic

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You know that song "FIrework" by Katy Perry? Well, I ate a hotdog last night.

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Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

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What did one dog say to the other dog? Bark.

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How do giant spiders like to spend their weekends? Eating Orphans.

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Why did the child cry? His sister just left for college

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What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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How many moose does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, it is biologically and theoretically impossible for a moose to climb a ladder and screw in a light bulb.

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead Zebra

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I feel like am motherf***ing stuck in this duck and it makes me wana quack like what the f**k is THAT!

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Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

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Two Scientologists walk into a bar. For $5,000 you can hear the rest of this joke.

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Yo mamma's so fat that the gravity required to keep her on the ground is significantly smaller than an average sized human.

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Two guys walk into a bar. But the third one was a duck.

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Why did Joe not cross the road? Because the Pedestrian Crossing light said not to.

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What's worse than a guy staring at you? Two guys staring at you.

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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