What did the man say after jumping into a well? He didn't say anything because he died instantly after jumping head first into a dry, 20 foot well. His family mourned for three days.

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"I have a job perfromance review today!" Earl told his wife. "Good luck, I will make you a special dinner tonight," Melinda, his wife, responded.

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Whats worse than your roof caving in on you? Being stabbed by yard gnomes.

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why did the blonde put on a coat? because she was cold.

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Why couldn't the infant read the book? Because he was blind.

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How do you make a girl scout cry? Kill her family.

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whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican has elbows.

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a man walked into a bar, sat down and had a drink with his friends.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a giant scorpion.

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You die of loss of blood, under a pile of first-aid kits

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh

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A mexican fast food worker accidentally drops a cheeseburger on the ground. Realizing the floor is most likely unsanitary, he throws it out and gets the customer a new one.

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whats brown and sticky? Doody

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Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

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A stipper walked into a club, though it was a golf club so she tripped and cracked her skull on it.The end.

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what's worse then death? finding that your adopted, no one loves you and you mother raped you at the tender age of five.

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A Sodium atom walks into a bar. A Chlorine atom bumps into it, taking the electron, then making a bond. Suddenly, the police come in. They arrest the Chlorine atom, of course, but they also arrest the Sodium atom. He says, "what did I do?" The policemen say, "you're too ugly to be out in public."

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And if we met in 1780, I was a white southern aristocratic plantation owner and you were my dark skinned servant lady ... slave Whenever I could get away from the Mrs., I'd go to your shed and then I'd steal you kisses. But let's be serious, I'd still work you full time as a slave, there's a difference between romantic language and a complete disregard for socioeconomic trends.

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How many Soviet Russians does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, in Soviet Russia, light bulbs are an unavailable commodity because the tyrannical government has called for a ban on unnatural illumination. A fact which is not lost on Mikhail, the light bulb maker whose wife died because his lack of business caused him to miss payments on his hospital bills.

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Scrooge McDuck dives headfirst into his pool of gold coins... He breaks his neck from the impact of the landing and dies.

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why did tom shut his bedroom door? grandma was fingering herself

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bike? I don't enjoy riding bikes.

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What is the best joke ever? 1D

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Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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