What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can't drown babies in roast beef.

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Why was the school girl called a dork. Because a whale penis is called a dork, and she identically resembles a giant aquatic dick.

In America you read books, but in Soviet Russia, it's exactly the same as it is in America, because it's not possible for books to read humans.

What is funny about civil and women's rights? Nothing, they are very serious matters.

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

Texas! You are doing it the wrong way! Learn from Hitler, gas is cheaper.

Two muffins are sitting on a counter. One muffin says to the other "hello." The other muffin says "Oh my god a talking muffin!"

A Jewish boy walks up to his father and says: Dad, can I borrow 50 dollars? The dad responds: 40 dollars?!? What are you going to do with 30 dollars?!?

an object in motion continues to stay in motion unless acted upon by an external force :)

Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

What did the German girl say to me? entschuldigen Sie (excuse me)

Rain rain go away, and don't come back or else i will kill your family.

An American, a Canadian, an Afro-American and a Jew walk in a bar. They all order their favorite drink and go look for potential partners with whom they'd wish to engage in sexual relationships.

lets work together to make all racists jokes in negitives

What's worse than falling out of a tree and landing on a dog? Rape.

If you have a stroke, call 000

What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

would you rather harry styles my dick have harry styles suck my dick or both of you style on my harry dick?

A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor Wheres my tractor?

What do you call 50 jewish, homeless men peeing into a river? Pollution.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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