Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the guy fall into the ocean? He was surfing

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What isyellow and can't swim? a bulldozer

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats funny about a kid with down syndrome q: a lot of things, like his face

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A poor boy receives his first wrapped present in his entire life. Why did he hate it so much? Because it was a copy of "Mien Kampf" Is he Jewish? No, he actually does know what "Mien Kampf" is because he is poor and cannot read.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why couldn't the married couple have sex? They were lesbians who were saving up a sex change.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

You know the drill, the world is not as black and white as it was before, just because we are not on the same side, does not make us enemies either. As for whatever is going on, I can assure you I had nothing to do with the fall of the first underground, and neither will I make sure whatever you scraped together, large or small falls either, I realize I should have thought this trough some more, but we had little time to act on this one.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Drew Knowles is gay

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what do you call Tim Tebow on a bike with a clown hat on? Tim, Mr. Tebow whatever you want

thumb_up thumb_down +4

There's a black and a mexican guy in a car. Who's driving? The chauffeur.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's worse then ten dead babies in a barrel? The one at the bottom is still alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q.what semtemce is a most used lie by a fourteen year old? A. Yes i agree to the terms of service, and am above the age eighteen.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why don't men want to marry virgins? They are wary of women who are inexperienced and who they may be sexually incompatible with.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

My girlfriend wanted to talk about her feelings ... SO I TOLD THAT BITCH THAT... i really loved her and care about her feelings

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny? yeah niether do I

thumb_up thumb_down +4

how do you kill chuck norris? you dont, killing is illegal

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks " What'll You Have" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why didn't the man answer the Anti Joke? He had a severe mental disorder and was therefore incapable of speech.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

how do you punish hellen keller? you can't she's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +4

The song Barbra Streisand has more than 2 words.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why didnt the cannibal like the taste of the comedian? because the comedian smelled very bad and the cannibal forgot to add salt.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and dedication

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops