A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the Liver say to the Heart? Nothing, Organs can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -23

there r three guys on a bridge. They r chinese,mexican,&american. They each have a bottle of beer. The chinese dude says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. Then the mexican says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. The american takes a drink of his and sets it down he looks at the mexican and says I have enough of these in my country and throws the mexican over the bridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How do you get a elephant in a fridge? You open the fridge and put it in. How do you get a Rhino in a fridge? You take the elephant out and then put the rhino in. All the animals in the animal kingdom are at a meeting, what animal isn't there? The rhino, his in the fridge. How do you cross a river full of alligators? Walk across the allligators are at the meeting.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why is there a black president? Cause you voted for him. Thanks! Dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you call a leper in a spa bath? Say excuse me Sir (or Madam), I notice you have leprosy, did you know that it is treatable? MDT for multibacillary leprosy consists of rifampicin, dapsone, and clofazimine taken over 12 months. Dosages adjusted appropriately for children and adults are available in all primary health centres in the form of blister packages.[17] Single dose MDT for single lesion leprosy consists of rifampicin, ofloxacin, and minocycline. The move toward single-dose treatment strategies has reduced the prevalence of disease in some regions, since prevalence is dependent on duration of treatment. World Leprosy Day was created to draw awareness to leprosy and its sufferers

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the plane say to the world Trade Center on 9/11? Nothing a plane is an object therefore cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'Why the long face?' The horse replies 'I've got AIDS.'

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what would happen if american army lost their air supprt ? lmao

thumb_up thumb_down -23

"Is this the Krusty Krab ?" I'M TIRED OF YOUR SHIT TYRONE.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A man walked into a blind child's house and made him see again. He stepped outside, walked into traffic, and died as he was not used to the light.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the blonde fall off the cliff? She was blind and deaf so she never knew where to go, and her parents kicked her out for her problems. It is a sad situation that noone wants to go through

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what did the robber say to lady gaga to get her in the car?get in the car or i shoot you i just want your money!!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the chicken cross the road? He believed pedestrians had the right

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Justin Port#$ falls out of a tree. What happens? he breaks his neck and unfortually dies a long painful death.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

why was the black kid made fun of at school? Because he was a nerdy boy who drinks tea

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why is this joke funny It isn't

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why do we have brown eggs? Because black people have sex with chickens

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A guy finds a genie bottle. He rubs it. A genie appears and grant him 3 wishes. He wishes for a splendid woman, a lot of money, and a house.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a Muslim man flying a plane? The pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why do people like vacations? To get out of your family

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops