What did the platypus do whenever he walked into the bar? Nothing. It's a platypus, they don't do much.

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Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger. They had left the keys inside and no-one was around to help.

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a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

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If you can fit many clowns in a car and many mexicans in a car...how many mexican clowns will fit?

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Hello

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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I don't understand what's so bad about a worm in your apple. Just get the proper software to clean it up, or even better, get a PC

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what did the chocolate bar say to the ice cream cone? nothing: chocolate bars can't talk

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How do you stop a black person from drowning?.. Take your foot off his head

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Two in the front, three in the back, and 278 in the ash tray/\.

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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What's the difference between a Boy Scout and a Jew? One comes back from camp.

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead Zebra

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Why did the kid drop his football? He had a heart attack

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Billy Idol walks into a New York City Bar. He snorts lines of coke with his comrades in the bathroom and continues his night by having sex with attractive underage females

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Spongebob. "Hey Patrick, I thought of something funnier than 24." Patrick "Let me hear it." Spongebob "25"

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Why did the black man vote for Obama in the presidential election? Every person over the age of 21 has an open opinion to vote for the person of their choice to run as president for a 4-year term.

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Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

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How babies can you fit in a car seat? 1

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Why can Randy Moss Jump so high? Because he trained to jump high.

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The First National Tree Bank just closed down. Don't worry it started a brand new branch.

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Q. What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car. A. Get in the car.

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What happened to the chinese man who walked into a wall with a boner? He hurt himself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops