Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

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HOw do u DEFeat thE hatErsz shitted on em

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Joseph Coney could die... or worse... he could do anything but that....

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Of course, the capacity to create a better society, is well within the natural limits of humankind, we do not need Gods in order to be strong, honorable kind, respectful, and so on, we do not need empty promises. We only need, to use our potential as humans, believe in it, and do our best only, if we desire the best results, take care of those that suffer, and believe that they will be there for us when we need them. We can all do it, humanity, yet choosing a lifestyle where we become peasants or soldiers, all promised happiness AFTER we have lived our lives, is what the people have decided. This is the extent of the average man and woman, even if it is far beyond the power of humanity.

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David entered a radio contest to see who had the best pun; his pun was insufficient and he did not win.

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Why do elephant tusks stick out? For uprooting trees and bushes, and for defending their young.

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One day a there was a guy walking down the street. If you thought this was a joke, you're wrong.

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road A: you are adopted

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A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

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What do you say when you see a black guy? Hello,how are you today?

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Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

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Why do blondes where knickers? to keep their ankles warm

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What's the difference between a tree and a lamp? One is a tree, one is a lamp.

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whats green and lives in the water

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What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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Guess what? What? You guessed correctly.

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What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers. -Del Primm

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We found a cure for cancer. Death

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Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

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If one train is heading North at 60 mph, na danother train is heading South at 45 mph, how many waffles are on the roof? The answer is purple, because aliens like coffee.

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Everyone is different, but there are two of me, therefore I am unique. I have 72 different personalities, which all think, act and behave the same, all have my same name, but its still different to have such a thing eh? No I am not asking, I just added that weird little lightbulb symbol after "eh". People buy my book, its full of this nonsense... Its named "Are you left winged, or wrong winged" The book that has nothing to do with politics, and everything to do with politicians non existent sexlife! (seriously I had a book signing today... It was weird, people like stood in line twenty Signatures... AND PEOPLE ARE ALL GOING "HEY ARE YOU THAT GUY FROM HORSEHEAD?" Nero -WHO THE FUCK! IS THAT GUY ON HORSEHEAD?

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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why is ur dad an alcoholic? he drinks a lot of alcohol

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops