What is the same about a plum and an elephant? They're both grey except the plum

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan.

does this look unsure to you?

The street outside of my house is covered in jelly. I have done this.

How do you keep a dog from barking? Kill it.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your doorstep? A: Whatever his name is.

What do you call a group of asians? China.

What's that smell? Your grandmother being burned alive.

What did one duck say to the other? Well, it said "Quack" but it's not certain if it was actually addressing the other duck or if it was just making a noise in response to some other stimulus.

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Gloves.

A dyslexic pimp buys a warehouse.

why did the boy drop her ice cream? -he got hit by a bus

Duncan Traywick is hilarious.

A blind woman walks into a bar... she stands there confused because she is blind and can't tell what going on.

A cathlic priest walks into a bar, but realizes there are no young boys hr could pickup.

How do you drown a blonde? Hold her head under water.

a mexican is walking through the desert with no food or water, and no clothes. he'll probably die soon.

Two parrots are in a cage. The one looks at the other one and says, "answer the phone," and the other one says, "where are my car keys."

Oh hey is your dad good at golf? No, he's not really good at anything except lying.

DERP

What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? I don't cum on my watermelon before I eat it.

Why didn't the man win the lottery? Because his lottery numbers weren't drawn.

What do you get when you mate an elephant with a rhino? Not much of anything except inter-species animal sex, considering the fact that the two do not share enough genetic material to create any sort of offspring.

What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? Mentally confused.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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