You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

A guy walks into a bar. No one notices he has epilepsy.

What did the deaf girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was Jewish

What did the lady say to the boy who's parents just died? Haha, your parents just died.

I was there when Lebron James hit a home run to win the Super Bowl.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? The pilot. You racist.

Roses are red Violets are blue The other color on our flag is white I'm an American and rhyming doesn't matter

Why did the guy go to the store? He really doesn't want you to know every detail of his life.

I'm called the! no i wish am I left

Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

What do u call something that's sticky and in a stick form? A glue stick :)

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

Why did bethany fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Bethany

how do you find will smith in the snow? look for his teeth

What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

what do you do with a fat little chug...kick em in the guts

se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

Your momma is so fat, she doesn't have a birthday. She has a birthweek.

whats the difference between a black man playing basketball and a white man playing basketball? They are different races

A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

Yamum is so poor that she has trouble supporting herself and paying her own bills. Subsiqeunetly she had her electricity and home phone cut off, not that she would have any use for a home phone with her electricity cut off anyway. She sits on her bed and cries herself to sleep each night and has been thrown into depression due to her spiraling financial debts of which she can see no end to. This has led to several attempts to take her own life to hopefully finally find a way out of her misery and debt.

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas. A new vest and a puppy because his father got a promotion and a much higher pay raise.

Why did the man give money to a drug dealer? He lost a bet.

What did the mute person tell the deaf person? Nothing. Even if sound could emit from his vocals the impaired of hearing person would still be unable to respond unless they have taken classes to read lips. The deaf person didn't take classes nor did the mute person learn sign language.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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