wife: why are women's feet smaller husband: so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink

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How do you make a clown cry? Hit him with a chair then rape his children

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What is furry, red, and flat? Road kill.

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Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

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Once upon a time, there were two brothers jumping on a bed. The one stopped because the other fell off the bead and died.

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A guy dared his friend to jump off a bridge for 10 bucks. His friend, fearing for his life did not jump.

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David Cameron

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am Jack Bauer, Where is the nuke?

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Why did a boy get slapped in the hand? A; because he had it in the persons face

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What's the difference between Little Billy and Ice Cream? People like Ice Cream.

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What's worst then finding a worm in your apple Eating it.

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whats worse than dropping your toast butter side down ? being ripped apart from the anus upwards by a large black man

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How many dyslexic people does it take to ruin Christmas? One, because they murdered you mother on your birthday.

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Did you hear about the homosexual that walked out of a hospital? He just found out he was HIV positive. (ic3)

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What does a black person and ebola have in common? They both kill people

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Q: What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? A: Ten babies nailed to eleven trees.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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A Jew walks into a bar. He immediately turns around and walks out because prices at this particular high end bar are much too high for his liking.

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Roses are red Violets are purple. I just realized that nothing rhymes with "Purple".

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Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

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Q: Why didnt jim win the race ? A: Because he swalowed his tounge.

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They say laughter is the best medicine but i've always found it hard to laugh at cancer.

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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