Why did the Polish man cross the road? Because the doctors was across the road, and he had a doctor appointment in five minutes time.

You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

What did the grizzly bears have for lunch? Fish and tourists.

When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

What happened to the young baby after her mother died It grew up got a collage degree and had a great life growing up with her dad and visiting the cemetery every year

Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Wanna hear a joke? no

A man walks into a bar not a duck though

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was an animal with a small brain and could not comprehend the situation.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. They were walking and baby tomato starts lagging behind. So the papa tomato stomps on the baby tomato and says nothing because tomatoes can't talk.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

Knock Knock. Doors open

what's funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Pretty much anything because infant mortality is in no way funny

What did the average man say the the bird? HOODINI

Have u seen Ray Charles' piano "no" neither did he

Why did the girl cry? i took her happy meal.

knock knock WHO'S THERE?! ARE YOU A SEX CRIMINAL?! NO ONE WANTS TO DO THAT TO YOU MUM!

Q: What happened to the fat man on the roller coaster A: The roller coaster went slightly faster due to the laws of gravity

Poems are great but sometimes they don't make refridgerater

What's bigger than a moose? An even bigger moose.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...