How many moose does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, it is biologically and theoretically impossible for a moose to climb a ladder and screw in a light bulb.

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What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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The boy gets shot in the face, he then dies of childhood obesity.

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The foreskin of a baby gorilla

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What's worse than a guy staring at you? Two guys staring at you.

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Who lives in a pineaplle under the sea? Nobody but bacteria that will slowly eat your stomach.

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Did you know that in Africa, every 60 seconds... A minute passes. So sad

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I feel like am motherf***ing stuck in this duck and it makes me wana quack like what the f**k is THAT!

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Yo mamma's so fat that the gravity required to keep her on the ground is significantly smaller than an average sized human.

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Two guys walk into a bar. But the third one was a duck.

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Your momma's so ugly, she has endure self-esteem issues relating to her appearance that have plagued her since grade school.

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Roses are red, yup.

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Q Why did the feminist cross the road? A To suck my dick

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A woman walking alone through a poor area of town. She is approached by a man who proceeds to mug her, rape her, and murder her.

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What do call a someone with no arms, legs, and has an eye patch? Names

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. Open up. We have a warrant for your arrest.

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Want to hear an anti-joke? Yes. Well I'm not going to tell you one.

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How was the copper wire invented? 2 Jews pulling on the same penny!

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Why does Eric Clapton use a Mac? Because he prefers Macs.

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How can you tell if a woman is stupid? Yell the word "STUPID'' and see if she turns around.

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Why was the girl unhappy with her male teacher? Because he gave her a bad grade...and raped her the night before.

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roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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Two muffins are cooking in the oven, they say nothing to one another as muffins can't talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops