How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at it.

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What did the man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Oh my goodness! Are you alright?!"

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Q: How do you confuse a blonde. A: Put her in a circular room and tell her to pee in the corner. Q: How does a blonde confuse you? A: She says she's done.

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Why did Larry drop his suitcase? Because he had no arms. A) Knock knock, B) Who's there? A) Not Larry

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why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

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What's 2+2? Gonorrhea

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My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

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Why was the elf sad Because a polar bear ate his family

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What worse that punching a baby? Stabing one.

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What do you call a house full of Mexicans? A house

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Why did Bill fall out if his chair? He was hit by an airplane.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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whats a diffrence between a bench and a black person the bench is a thing a black person is a human being

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A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

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Two pies where sitting in a oven when one of the pies says: God damn it's hot in here. The other pie screams out loud: HOLY SHIT A TALKING PIE!

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I have never liked jokes. They promote laughter, which is the music of Satan strangling hairy children and wildebeast. I'd like to thank anti-joke.com for their work in the struggle against hilarity.

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My dog got out of it's cage. So I found it and be the shit out of

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Ask me if I'm a tree I don't need to, because I know you're not a tree

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A black man, a jewish man and a white man walk into a bar. The black man shoots the bartender, the white man takes the money and the jewish man holds the customers hostage.

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Why has there never been a Mexican on the moon? Because Mexico's government funding for their space program is insufficient to take them all the way to the moon.

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A wise man once said, "I am wise".

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whats your budget like? a budget.

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full house should of been called black jack, because the Olsen twins started getting hit on at age 8 and didn't stop til they were 21

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What do you call a black man that works with out pay? A volunteer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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