A man walks into a bar. Cool story, bro.

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There's an Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman. They are all trapped in a jail cell. Eventually they all starved to death.

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

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You should get a new joke book............ because the newest edition has just be released

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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A priest and rabbi walk into a bar. The priest leaves because they don't have wine.

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Why was the man foolish for buying a new lamp? Because he lived in a small shack with no electricity and was probably going to die soon.

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Chicken

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I rode in to town on an ass... ur momas ass!!

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A blind man walks into a book store. He asks if they have any books in Braille. The employee says "Yes! Many you haven't even seen before!"

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

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An Octopus walked into a bar. He then died as he had been out of his natural habitat for an exceedingly long period of time. An octopus can only survive on land for 30 minutes.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

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Q. Why do cheetahs run so fast? A. Because their bodies allow them to.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ... So he didn't get Mono from Janelle.

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what is red and bad for your teeth? a brick

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Why is the turkey always full? Because he is stuffed.

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So a guy walked into the doctors and said, "It hurts when I poke my leg like this." The doctor said, "Well don't poke your leg like that."

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What's white, wet, and loved by women? A polar bear cub.

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Want to hear a joke? I hope not because I don't know any.

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I supported my sisters decision to get an abortion. Still would have been cool to be a dad :/

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Did you hear that Jerry Sandusky won the swimming race? He's in very good shape for a man his age.

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops