you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

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How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no reason. Chickens don't have the thinking skills to reason.

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A man jumped off a cliff and wished he could fly. He was hit by a plane

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Why did the chicken cross the road? AIDs.

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What happened to the boy who crossed the road without looking both ways? He was abducted by aliens.

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A very rich man had a daughter whom all of the men in town wanted to marry her for wealth. Except there was one man who wanted to marry her due to his love for her. The father let his daughter marry whomever she wanted from all of the men in town, and she chose a man named Wilson Fremblington who wanted to marry her for wealth, because he was physically fit and overall a friendly man.

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So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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What was the last thing that went through the crashing helicopter pilot's head? The propeller.

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I sas Ratzinger a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

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This is a shovels and rakes conversation. No hoes allowed.

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What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

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Why was little Alice and her family at the graveyard? Well someone had to come at her funeral...

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a black man pays his child support

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How do you kill a dumb blonde? Personally, I love stabbing them.

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You know whats funny about 9/11? Nothing.

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why did the cow go to the theater? to see the new movies pick one and have a good time.

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Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped in a van

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Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

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Why are women such horrible drivers? Their hair gets in the way.

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Two Canadian men are sitting in a room. Man 1: Do you know what happens when you shoot a wolverine? Man 2: No. Man 1: It absorbs the bullets, duh. The second man proceeds to go outside with a gun. He returns in a few minutes. Man 1: What did you do with that gun? Man 2: I shot a wolverine. Man 1: What happened? Man 2: It fell over and died. I think you watch too much X-Men.

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Yes 59 10 away from my faverite number....... 49

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What did the black guy get from his white girlfriend for valentines day? An HIV positive test result.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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