Ask me if I'm wearing pants. Are you wearing pants? Yeah.

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Q: How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dog house, if your parents are a washing machine and a dryer? A: Trick Question, dog houses can't fly!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

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Why does Santa Clause not have any children? Because he only cums once a year.

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What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

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Yo Mama's so fat when she fell out of the tree she hit the ground very, very hard.

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What is worse than getting stung by 1,000 bees? Getting stung by 1,001 bees.

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yo mama is so fat, she's obeise

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whats something naked and nailed to a cross? jesus, idiot.

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"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

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Knock knock stop knocking you idiot, it's the 21st century

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Small Penis.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

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Your mother is so ugly that her physical appearance causes her to have a low self-esteem.

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what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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A blonde walks into a bar therefore her face hurts

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how did sally die? she starved because she cant get in to get the nuggets.

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A man is driving the speed limit of 55 on the highway. He gets pulled over and the cop says, "Do you know how fast you were going sir?" The man replies "Well yes I was going 55, the speed limit." The cop says, "No you were going 80." The speedometers broken.

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So a guy walks up to a gay guy and says: "You are a fag." The gay guy says: "That is very offensive, you jerk." So the guy says: "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know what it meant" and the gay guy says: "I accept your apology." Then the gay guy crosses the street and gets hit by a bus

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* pretend your an orphan Knock knock Who's there? Not your parents.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

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You mama's so fat, that the doctor suggested that she go on a diet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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