Three men walked into a bar. Despite the fact that the bar was not an oblong piece of solid material as many would assume, the men entered through the tavern door simultaneously and found it most uncomfortable and awkward to be squished up against each other for several moments.

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What does karissas vagina taste like? Ask vantwon

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Two muffins are in the oven They didn't say anything.

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What do you call a tub full of water? A bathtub!

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What did the orphan get for christmas? Cancer.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm chuck norris. And I approve of this message.

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If Jonny has 300 pies and eats 299 pies what is left for Jonny? DIABETES

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It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

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Whiney the poo and the blustery day.

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what did the women say when she saw a tiger maul a rabbit? she didn't see it, she was in the kitchen cooking and ironing

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a man walks into a bar, he tells the bartender "im not a part of this SYSTEM"

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Horse walks into a bar. 'The barman says 'why the long face?' The horse says 'I've got cancer'.

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What happened when the black woman moved to the front of the bus? There were no seats available but everyone was very nice about it. She also asked for gum. Somebody did have gum. Which was nice.

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A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. I don't know, why? A. I asked first.

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Q. why did the chicken cross the road A. damn it this joke is a million years old shut up

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What happens when you give a boy a cookie? He falls asleep and his parents think he was kidnapped by a serial killer.

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What do you call a person who kills there own child? Casey Anthony.

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Knock Knock Opens door because they were expecting visitors

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"What's black when clean, but white when dirty?" "A blackboard."

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Why did the wolf cry boy? Cause he was a pedifile.

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What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? hypothermia.

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Whats hard and long and used to penetrate women? A hypodermic needle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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