you were so loud you woke helen keller up!!!!!!!

What did one cow say to the other cow? Nothing. Cows do not possess the ability to speak.

Give one reason for not visiting a hotel. Basil Fawlty is the manager.

- What do you call a black man who drives a bus? - An african american bus driver.

—Conversation started today— My God, why have you forsaken me? Seen 6:00 PM

What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My D**K

What say the mirror if i look in it,? He died

Why was the drunk man in jail? He had lost touch with himself because his wife cheated on him the previous night and to add to the fact she took his clothes so public nudity would be a problem.

How do you get a blonde to eat crayons? Threaten to kill her parents with a hacksaw.

josh moran where your Bluetooth gone?

What did the Liver say to the Heart? Nothing, Organs can't talk

How did freedom die in Europe? It was shot in the chest with a rifle.

Whats gayer then dancing with the stars? Justin beiber

Whats worse than a man who has had a hard day at work, he goes to a bar and gets drunk, he goes home and beats his wife? I his wife was fat and had cancer

Why is the country in a national deficit? Because the Illuminati want to control all human beings in a socialist new world order.

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

What do we call Osama? Osama

I f*cked your mom last night and she liked it. 8====D~~~~

What is purple, stupid, gay, and tells shitty jokes? I don't know. You think of something.

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

Yolo Pierre because of Etzio tickle shits faggatron and individual nut join forces to become the shit suckers

What's the difference between a volleyball and a tree? They're both volleyballs except for the tree.

roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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