- Anti Joke

Roses are red violets are blue monkeys like you belong in the zoo but don't be afraid I'll be there to that in the cage but laughing at you

A man walks into a store with a faulty washing machine. He provides a valid guarantee receipt at the customer service desk and it is replaced without an issue

What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

Knock Knock Jehovah's witnesses!

Why did the boy drop his peanuts and crackerjacks? He had a sudden heart attack and died at the age of 10

Two friends sit down at a table for lunch. One, in a very frustrated mood, says to the other, "You know what I don't get?" His friend immediately responds: "Sex."

how do you stop a black man from drowning take your foot off his head

Q. What is a deaf man's favorite song? A. Nothing, because he can not hear.

a guy walks in to a bar in iraq. 10 people died because of it

Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: toothpaste

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

What's the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The anti-Joke isn't a freaking joke. So stop freaking doing it!

To clowns walk into a bar. They don't notice each other because as soon as they walk to a 5-yard radius, the length that was said to be the range of a clowns eyesight (which was actually said by a controversial scientist, looked on as a madman; he created a whole clown-eyesight-range conspiracy), when a fire starts, creating a huge apocalyptic event. However, the two clowns go into the bar unphased. Both clowns then turn opposite directions. The clown on the right sits down with his drink and takes out his book about the Victorian Era. He constantly checks his watch. The clown on the left disapears into the croud, and steals french fries from table 36. After three hours, they both walk to the back of the bar, simultaneously tying their shoes not noticing their similarity in career choices. They both open a door marked PRIVATE (while tying their shoes). After sixteen days of exactly the same thing happening repeatedly... Both clowns see eachother on the way out of the bar. Little do the know that they are being watched by the scientist I mentioned earlier. Two Years Later Both clowns die instantly after being attacked by a giant war hammer-wielding octopus on the way home from the circus.

What do you call a white guy in a mostly black neighborhood? His name.

How do you make a toddler run faster? Chase it with a lawnmower.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What's the difference between cancer and my grandmother? She doesn't have cancer.

Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares...he didn't make it anyways..

What was Jenna's favourite ice cream flavour? Keyword; was, she's dead now

Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

how man

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike

what do you call a girl with a pumpkin spice coffee in her hands? Jenifer