Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

A woman becomes pregnant. 9 months later she has a baby.

How tall is a tree? Taller than the ground

haiku for you ladies and gents My mother once said, "Slow and steady wins the race" She died in a fire.

Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

what did charlie sheen do when his ex wife insulted him? he horribly abused her

What did I say to the joke? What? Correct.

your mom is so fat that when she walks in America with a yellow coat as they get a taxi

Why did the asain fail his tests? They weren't math tests...

What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

Whats the difference between a black guy at the beach, and a black guy at the zoo? One is at the beach, and one is at the zoo.

Alcoholic walks into a bar and then walks out because he promised his children and wife that he would straight out his life.

why did tom shut his bedroom door? grandma was fingering herself

Roses are Red And sometimes yellow My mother is mellow I have terminal cancer. I also fisted my grandpa's anus last night

A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

A recently widowed blond was on her way to an appointment with her attractive physician, when she realized that she was almost out of gas, so she stopped to refuel at a station near his office.

An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

What did the alcoholic tell his son? Don't do meth.

Why isn't Michael Jackson good at chess? Because he's dead.

Why didn't the Ginger love the pretty girl? Her attitude and personality weren't very similar to his so he presumed the relationship wouldn't work out. Uh...........stingray.

roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

What do you get when you cross a hooker with five shots of tequila? Herpes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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