I have read and agreed to the Terms of Service

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What do bluejays and cardinals have in common? They both Were born during the Medevil period.

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MRCANN YOUR A FUCKIN' CARROT LERN 2 FOCKIN SIT IN YER HOLE YA FUCKIN PLANT

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How do you make Samuel L. Jackson cry? Trick question...Samuel L. Jackson don't cry. ever...

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs? An amputee

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The Yak, a long-coated bovine found in the Himalayas, is named for its distinct call, which sounds similar to "yak-yak-yakyak".

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Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

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Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

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Texter 1: Hey, do you want to hang out? Texter 2: Sorry dude, i lost my phone, i'm trying to find it Texter 1: Ok, text me when you find it Texter 2: OK

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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What's brown and seven feet tall? A door

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

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What do you get when you combine a baby and a chainsaw? 30 years to to life in prison.

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The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

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What do you call something green and fuzzy? Grass, I lied about the fuziness.

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Who let the dogs out? The burglar, he broke the door and they ran out.

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Knock-Knock Who's there? Ketchup. Ketchup who? Ketchup-mustard.

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What happened to the lady living in the present, crossing a street? Let's watch her and find out.

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if it walks like a duck and looks like a duck your probably looking at a goose

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What do Ethiopians do on Fridays? Starve.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid with two stump arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Why was the little boy laying on the ground unconscious? because I threw a fridge at him.

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What does the fox say? Nothing a fox is incapable of speech.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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