Q:why did the man jump of the house A:he did not I threw a frige at him

why did the chicken cross the street? so it could throw a fridge at you, you are very loud at night for some reason and you wake everyone up. the chicken then goes home to watch gay porn videos.

knock knock... ....... no one replies.. the family is deff..

As I sat waiting for the doctor to return with my final prognosis, I began contemplating my own mortality. Looking inside myself, one question continued to haunt me: “What’s the X-ray technician going to do when he walks in and sees me messing with the equipment?”

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's better if you don't understand

A penis walks into a bar..

My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

A brunette, a redhead, and a blond are all stuck on an island 100 miles away from the nearest civilization with no resources. After 2 weeks, they decide that no one is going to save them and they have to swim for it. The brunette swims 25 miles and then gets eaten by sharks. The redhead swims 75 miles and then drowns. The blond swims 99 miles but got tired, so she swam back.

what do eagles and chetos have in common....... they both can fly except for the chetos

Children and bretheren, stinky cheese Stinkyy cheeeese. Like this or you will smell stinky cheese in your bedroom

What is worse that a bee sting? 2 bee stings what is worse that 2 bee sting? Kony what is wose than Kony? 3 bee stings what is worse than 3 bee sting? being allergic to bee stings

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

Mommy how come daddy went to the doctors today? Well sweetie, honestly daddy wanted me to shove things up his ass And I refused to so he went to the doctors so they can do it...

Jerry: Hi what's your name? Bob: My name is bob. Jerry: Bob, nice to meet you, my name is Jerry. Bob: Nice to meet you Jerry.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday, Popeyes has a special sale buy one get one free fried chicken. The chicken was like "Oh hell no, today's Tuesday? I'm funna get my feathery-asss out of here.." However, chickens do not know what day it is, nor do they care about being captured by humans. I also made up the part when the chicken began talking.

why did the kid burst into flames cause he lit himself on fire

Knock knock. Who's there? Insurance. Insurance who? I'm sorry, sir; we can't fix your liver because you don't have any insurance.

what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

2 muffins are in a oven for 30 minutes, the baker then questions why he only baked 2 muffins.

You know you have no friends when you steal someone's ALIAS concept and disrespect what is perhaps the most intellectually satisfying form of humour. [L]

a guy walks into a bar.. ouch

A person affected by Alzheimer's is asked a knock knock question- Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Wait what are we doing again?

Whats the difference between a red cup and a blue cup. Ones red and the other is blue.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...