How do you keep an idiot in suspense?

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What did the fork say to the spoon? To get to the other side.

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roses are red violets are blue me + you =the perfect 2

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"Knock Knock" "Just ring the bloody bell for once!"

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Joke below was made by Daniel Textor, he's a d i c k.

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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what did the soup kitchen give people for christmas Meatloaf] -Fluzturnusturbusturcusterdustur

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Why is did the blonde cross the road? She was trying to catch the chicken.

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What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

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Why did the child cry? His sister just left for college

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Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

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A young boy walked in on his mom and dad in their room lastnight They were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

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Roses are red , Violets are blue You little dumb ass bitch Ain't fuckin' with yoouuuuuu

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What did the homeless man buy with a dollar? Nothing. He didn't have a dollar.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen cheese

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Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

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what did the lesbian say to the man? I don't like penis

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Did u hear about the jew that bought something not on sale? Neither did i.

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Q: What do you call a serial killer named Mark? A: Mark.

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what does a buttler put in a closet ? stuff.

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What do u when life gives u lemons? U put them in your iced tea.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Big Brother. Big Brother who? That's right. ALL are who, Akbar!

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What's green and blue, and red all over? Nothing. It if were red all over it wouldn't be green and blue.

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An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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