What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

What would you do for a kwuandike bar? Anything clean and sanitary that wouldn't provide harm to me or others near me

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

what did the left eye say to the right eye? "eye" see you

What did the alien say to the other alien? It's hard to say. They could use an inefficient form of aural analog communication, or a hyper-advanced form of telepathy. Either way, modern science hasn't brought us far enough to determine.

What is black white green blue and is wet and blind and deaf and homosexual all at the same time? What ever I just described

last night i was doing some guy in the ass. i went to give him a reach around and the homo had a boner! freakin queer.

A man walks into a bar He's an alcoholic and it's ruining his family

what do you get when you combine sodium and hydroxide? sodium-hydroxide

Michael Jackson and Barack Obama talked to each other about oreos

How did Whitney huston die? By eating a turkey sasandwich and then put a car jump starter in the bath tub.

What do you call a fat computer? Adele :)

Big feet on a man means he has, Nothing, a man's foot size has no relation to the size of his penis.

Two men walk into a bar, get drunk, and drive home. Unfortunately, they crash into a tree and are mortally wounded.

Q: What do you call a pair of dead babies lying on the ground? A: Slippers

Water is blue. Fire is red. Come on let me show you what happen in the bed.

I was about to do an triathlon, but i took an arrow to the knee. It got infected and i promptly died two days later.

Q. What do you call a small hen that can't lay eggs properly? A. A small hen that can't lay eggs properly.

Two muffins are in the oven They didn't say anything.

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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