How do you kill a blonde? You stab her many times in the ear with a fork......Then finsih her off with a spoon. No knives those hurts

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*there was a tv sitting on the side of the road..* person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!

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You: Ask me if I like lasagna. Them: Do you like lasagna? You: No.

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why did the boys run from Michael Jackson? because they thought he was a ghost

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Why shouldn't you tell a joke during an earthquake. Cause it is not the time nor the place to tell a joke

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A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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Roses are Expensive. Violets are Gay. Poems are for pussies... Have a nice day!

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies " My daughter just died of leukemia."

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"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

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When life gives you lemons, refrigerate them so they don't go bad.

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That's not mine! it's bigger and blacker! ...where have i heard this before?

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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whats white a smells like paint. whtie paint.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

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If you driving a jetski and the wheeles fall off how many screws does it take to fix the dog house? BLUE PAINT

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What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and dedication

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Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, It's not my fault, I found you in a zoo!

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The global news

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Chlamydia

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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