The once was a man from Nantucket, Who gave up on his life and said "damn this!" Then he won lots of money, His future looked bright and sunshiny Until one day he suddenly died

quiz is to quizzicle as test is to test___.

Whats brown and drives people around? A cab driver of south asian decent. Finding a job that alligns with their qualifications and experience is not always possible, so they take up menial jobs to survive and provide for their family.

Christianity is not a religion; it's a relationship with God.

A mother had three kids: 1st kid- “Mom, why did you name me Daisy?” Mom- “Because when you were a baby a daisy fell on your head.” 2nd kid- “Mommy, why did you name me Rose?” Mom- “Because when you were a baby a rose fell on your head.” 3rd kid- “Blahblahblahflismdjsk” *makes retarded noises* Mom- “SHUT UP BRICK!”

Why did the teacher arrive late for class? Because his father had a stroke the night before, and they had to rush to the hospital and because of exhaustion, he missed the bus, and arrived ten minutes late.

A man visits an anti joke site looking for some humor. realizing that its not funny, he closes the window.

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

What is brown and sticky? Maple Syrup.

Why was Timmy so unpopular at school? Because he caught aids of his pet rock

How did the fat guy servive the plane crash??????? He bounced

A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

No soap radio

What's worse than finding a worm on your apple? Trench foot on your eyebrow.

What do you call a smart phone that doesn't want to work? The first conscious phone ever

Do homeless people get knock-knock jokes?

The Lord told Moses to come forth. He tripped and came fifth.

Why was the Asian woman late for work? She was raped.

AIDS is not a lifestyle it's a choice - and you chose wrong.

Q: What do you call a Jew in space? A: An astronaut you racist bastard!

Nero7 How are you doing? This is "Eliza" I hope I will be joining, but I cannot reach you by phone, please respond ASAP time is running out.

what do jews, blacks, and asians have in common? they have all been targets of racism!

What's green and has wheels? A refrigerator, I lied about the green and the wheels.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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