Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't become rotisserie with a side of hash brown.

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What's the difference between sand and menstral blood? I can't gargle sand

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A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. He was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral.

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What's the difference between a duck? They are mostly the same, only one leg is shorter.

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What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

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What happens after Madeline McCann disappears. Jokes.

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Why didnt the boy go to school? His mum threw a fridge at him!

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What do you give a homeless person? Poop in a bottle.

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Why did the blond have a wierd look on her face? Because she was ugly

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Q: A policeman is working past a room. The window is too high to see in. The person hears "no John, don't", and then a gunshot. He rushes inside and sees a dead body on the floor with a gun beside him. Also in the room are a doctor, a lawyer and a priest. Without asking any questions, he immediately arrests the priest. Why? A: Because the priest is the only male in the room.

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in a car crash an entire family is killed from death until they all die

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Ring Ring! Hello? Hello, is your refrigerator running? Yes it is Good.

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What is the difference between a Jew and pizza? Pizza does not scream when it goes in the oven.

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What's black and shouldn't have the right to vote? Ants

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How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb none, because chickens do not have opposable thumbs,therefore prevents them from preforming such a remedial task.

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BRANDON LUI ROCKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

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Why did the chicken cross the road...

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Why did the personal trainer get fired from the gym? He lacked good customer service skills.

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why should not women able to vote? because their stupid and should not vote at all

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Ross Tumilty is gay 8===D

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What's worse than being arrested by a cop? Dying of AIDS.

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yo momma so old that when she whent to school there was no history class

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If an ice cream van goes out of business, who drove the Jeep into the furniture store? To get to the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops