field day?

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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No, you would have made me unhappy and yourself miserable, until you truly value who you are, as we that still look up to you to this day, you wont see the greatness within you.

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My name's Forrest Gump. People call me Forrest Gump.

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Romney: I think you would raise our debt and make more Americans jobless. Obama: It's just cuz I'm black!

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Tell me who you are, who you are working for, I wont tell anybody, and I will have someone to hack this site on the hour and remove these comments, please.

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You're so ugly, when yo' mama dropped you off at school, she kissed your forehead and called you beautiful.

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Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

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Why are black people scared of chainsaws? Because the chainsaws go run nigga nigga run.

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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roses are red violets are puffy i am a donkey i ate some water

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What did the boy with no legs get? A treadmill.

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when life gives you lemons throw them away.. they are probably bad

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I told my friend one of these anti-jokes, he took it seriously and beat my head with a bat.

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What comes after 69? 70

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How do you get a cat out of a tree? You throw a rock at it

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Emily Walker.

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There was a a round house with no corners.How many corners were there? 100 ,I never said that that it had to be that house.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He simply lost grip of the cone and it fell out of his hand

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Why are hurricanes named after women? They're wet and wild when they come and take your car and house when they leave.

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A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

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What kind of martial arts does the Jewish man practice? Kung-Fu

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Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

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Whats the difference between a black guy at the beach, and a black guy at the zoo? One is at the beach, and one is at the zoo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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