What's the difference between an alligator and an argyle sweater? There are far too many conceivable differences between the two objects to be able to give an actual definite variance between them.

Q. What's a pirate's favorite type of movie? A. It depends on the individual pirate, although most modern-day pirates are from third world countries like Somalia and so are too poor to be able to watch many movies. Classical pirates like those depicted in Treasure Island or Pirates of the Carribean are, of course, from a period of history before movies had been invented, so couldn't possibly have had a favorite.

There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

What's hard when you eat a vegetable? The wheelchair.

There's a white guy and a black guy, on a bridge. Of corse the idiot white guy jumps off. But the black guy yells, I NEVER LIKED U!!!!! Later that day the police showed up and asked wat happened. The black guy said, U GOT NO EVIDENCE!!! The police say true and walk away. Then go to Dunkin Donuts and get a triple chocolate donnut and coffee. They lived happily ever after. Except for the white guy. :)

It is so hot out here, that it could melt an ice cube that was once in the freezer!

1/= |_| (4|\| /234|) 7|-|15 (411 */0|_|/2531/= 4 1337 |-|4><0/2!!!1!

Why are all teachers stupid? They´re not. Why would you say that?

What did ahmet say to adem...? LEMME SUCK ON THOSE TITS joke made by dark

a black hispanic and asian man jump off a cliff they all die and their families morn their deaths

What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

your momma is so fat that when she steps on the scale it shows that she is overwhieght

What's black and white, and red all over? Nothing, those two events are mutually exclusive of each other.

mitchell palmer sucks

whats the difrence between a japaneese and chineese person? one is from japan and one is from china.

Roses are red Violets are blue Horses that lose Are made into glue

What happens when you throw a yellow rock into a purple river? it makes a splash

Chris Brown walks into a bar. And then is politely asked to leave as the bar owner also happens to be the spokesperson for an anti-domestic violence group.

why did the magician stop doing magic ? he got hit by a bus and died

Why did the chicken cross the road? He believed pedestrians had the right

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

I am a schizophrenic, so am I.

why did the monkey fall out of a tree?? a snail threw a refridgerator at him

Q: Whats blue and white and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A: A tree wearing a denim jacket.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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