You know whats better than cold pizza? Winning a nobel prize.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Why did Kurt Cobain commit suicide? Because it was drug related

thumb_up thumb_down +50

What did the man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Oh my goodness! Are you alright?!"

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Q: How do you confuse a blonde. A: Put her in a circular room and tell her to pee in the corner. Q: How does a blonde confuse you? A: She says she's done.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Why did Larry drop his suitcase? Because he had no arms. A) Knock knock, B) Who's there? A) Not Larry

thumb_up thumb_down +46

why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +46

My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

thumb_up thumb_down +44

why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What's 2+2? Gonorrhea

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why was the elf sad Because a polar bear ate his family

thumb_up thumb_down +42

How can you tell the difference between a cow? One says moo

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What worse that punching a baby? Stabing one.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What do you call a house full of Mexicans? A house

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why did Bill fall out if his chair? He was hit by an airplane.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

whats a diffrence between a bench and a black person the bench is a thing a black person is a human being

thumb_up thumb_down +38

A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Whats worse than pulling down a girls pants and seeing a giant furry bush... finding out her vagina has teeth in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Two pies where sitting in a oven when one of the pies says: God damn it's hot in here. The other pie screams out loud: HOLY SHIT A TALKING PIE!

thumb_up thumb_down +36

I have never liked jokes. They promote laughter, which is the music of Satan strangling hairy children and wildebeast. I'd like to thank anti-joke.com for their work in the struggle against hilarity.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

My dog got out of it's cage. So I found it and be the shit out of

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Ask me if I'm a tree I don't need to, because I know you're not a tree

thumb_up thumb_down +36

A black man, a jewish man and a white man walk into a bar. The black man shoots the bartender, the white man takes the money and the jewish man holds the customers hostage.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops