Michael Jackson and Barack Obama talked to each other about oreos

What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

why did the little boy fall down?? Because a terrorist shot him

Why did the man have a really short temper? HOW THE **** SHOULD I KNOW???

What's black and white and red all over? A dead Zebra

My cat just died.

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jasper walks into a bar, he sees an elephant and can't believe his eyes. he says "HORGWARSH!"

What is Blue, Pink, and Green, and sometimes sparkles when wet? Grass. I lied about the Blue and Pink to throw you off...because I can.

Did you hear about the man with the bicycle? He was 2 tired.

A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

If i was gay... I would have strong sexual feelings towards peolple of the same sex as me

What did the hispanic say to the black guy? I'm not sure. I wasn't listening because eavesdropping is rude.

You must be Jamaican cause you have long dreadlocks and you are listening to Bob Marley

Why did Michael Phelps drown? He didn't because he is the best swimmer in olympic history.

nathan your cats dead now...well hopefully

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

What's the difference between a man and a woman? Generally speaking- biology, except in cases of transexuality.

Sex education in Texas,

Pilot: We need to lighten the load of this plane Italian: I'll throw out these pizzas, there are too many of them in my country Mexican: I will throw out these tacos, there are just too many of them in my country The american stares in horror at the two men, the pizza and tacos were their only food and they were lost in the Himalayas.

what is the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babes. when i saw the Porsche i told the guy nice car and he was like yea whatever then i went and killed 50 babes and lost conciseness when i woke up i saw the Porsche again and thought what a nice car and when i saw the babes i thought what kind of monster killed all those babes

What did the man say to the tree? Nothing, he was a mime.

A man walks into a bar. He hasn't been there before, and it's a Friday so it's really crowded, and it's really quite a dive, so he and his girlfriend decide to leave and find somewhere else to eat.

yo mama so dumb... because she was not properly educated

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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