Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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What's Tyrion Lannister short for? It's not short for anything, it's his full name.

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why did the girl cry while watching starwars? She was being raped

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How do you put a baby to sleep? Snap its neck.

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Your mom is so fat that she turns "One Size Fits All" to "One Size Fits Most"

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Q. Why did the lady scream when she saw her husband? A. Because he was dead.

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Why do so many black athletes drive black cadillac escalades? Because it's roomy and they deserve to reward themselves after they put in so much hard work trying to be the best player they can be.

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Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree? No

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what did the blind man see? Nothing he felt the penis in his butt.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesnt rhyme And your entire family died trying to fly to your house for Christmas. They crashed into a orpanage for death children. There were no survivors.

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Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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had a good wank over anime yesterday xoxo dylan hodge

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Why didn't Sebastian get out of the forest? Because he got brutally murdered by a big bad wolf

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One linners President Kinnedy did you like the parade President Lincon did you like the play

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America

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What do you call a human with no eye? A Human.

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Your mumma's so fat she is fat

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Why did the skeleton cross the road? Because Apocalypse arrived and dead people now have the ability to walk.

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Why did the man die? He had a terrible form of flesh-eating bacteria and he suffered a lot of pain.

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the awkward moment when a sentence doesnt end the way you think it octopus

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? To get his chemotherapy

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You are joking right?

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Why was Justin Beiber Booed off the stage. Because I spelt his last name incorrectly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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