Who lives in a pineaplle under the sea? Nobody but bacteria that will slowly eat your stomach.

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Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

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A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

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Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

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What's blue and smells like sky? Sky

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Why was the multi-millionaire entreprenuer sad? He went bankrupt.

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A white player in the NBA. Wait...

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What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

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Why did Elsa go into hiding. She died

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what do you call one black man surrounded by ten white men.... A story teller

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I was going to write a joke about procrastination, but I haven't gotten to it yet.

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Q. A couple went on a boat. The boat sank. Every single person died, who survied? A. The couple.

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Jesus Christ

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whats the best anti joke ever? mine you dipshit

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A man walks into a bar…. he then looks around checking to make sure no one saw this abashing action. He sees no one did then plashing a big smile on hst face he begins to strut forward only to trip over an empty can of spray cheese. it is important to note that this spray cheese was low fat

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Why didn't the boy get his mom anything for her birthday? He was killed by a drunk driver years ago

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? ...Not being retarted.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I love you a lot But you're dead and I have unhealthy necrophiliac tendencies

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Why did the kid drop his football? He had a heart attack

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Q: What did the Mexican say to the other Mexican? A: To get to the other side.

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What is big, green, fuzzy, and would kill you if it fell on you? A pool table.

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How do you blindfold an Asian person? With a blindfold

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For 10 cents a day you can feed an African...they eat pennies.

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Q: why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: what 10 year old WOULDN'T?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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