how do you kill a man? slowly saw off all their limbs and then jump up and down on the torso and let all the organs fly out

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Where was the Decoration Of Independence Signed? At the bottom.

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an old lady walked into a bar, used the bathroom and left. THE END

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? It doesn't matter, the only chuck that matters is Chuck Norris.

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

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What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

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why couldn't the blind man hear? because he was also deaf.

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What's green and gets you high? Marijuana.

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haha

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If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

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Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

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What did the bicycle say to the fat kid? Nothing, bikes cant talk.

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FOX News: Fair and balanced

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whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

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Why was the blonde so dumb? She had a severe case of dyslexia, which made it difficult to study.

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There were 2 strawberries sitting in a bathtub One strawberry said "Hey can you please pass the soap? The other strawberry replies "WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM A TYPEWRITER??"

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chickens, roads, horses, bars,roses, violets, sally, knock, knock, fnord

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Why did the slut suck a dick? Because she's a slut.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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Whats worse than losing your keys? Your entire family dying in a preventable house fire.

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What's worse than getting an erection in church Getting an erection while naked in church

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

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hey guys im gay

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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