Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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Johnny: I saw you long time ago. You were quite the school clown back in the day. Boy I remember back when I was just a whipper snapper we used play around and goof around all day. Whatdya think? Richard: Shut up, motherfuckingbitch

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what is 2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2-2+2x0 20

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When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the world, He broke his foot because every human being that kicks such a solid structure would break their foot.

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Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

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why did the women give her sister a present because it was her birthday

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Q:why was steve sad? A:he had an extra penis

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Japanese study of the stereotypical Italian under scientifical environment: Japanese: Test one: Hello! Italian: AHAHA HOHOO! WHOPPIE! ME IS MARIO MARIO I AM MAGIC MUSHROOM EATING PLUMBER! I AMMA GONNA JUMP ON YOU (AND gRAPE YOU!) Japanese: ACTIVATE FLAMETHROWERS GET! Italian: AHAHAHAHAHOOOOOOOOOOO! Japanese: OMG ITALIAN IS STRONG! ACTIVATE TRAP DOOR! ITALIAN: *falls down door* MAMA MIA! OH NOH! Japanese: Puh! BEWARE OF ITALIAN STEREOTYPE! Experiment two:Japanese experiment with in actual Italia: Japanese: Hello Mr Itali... Italian: Are you looking at me? Japanese: Uh well I... Italian: ARE YOU LOOKING AT MEEE? WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS TO LOOK ME IN THE EYES EH? Japanese: Balls? Uh my mother when she gave birth to... Italian: I SAID WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS TO TALK TO ME! ITALIANS ARE DANGEROUS!

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Yo mamma is so fat that she can fit through a skinny doorway. Actually, yo mamma isn't fat at all, but rather a normal sized woman secure in her weight.

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Richard Nixon walks into a bar. Everyone is thrilled to meet a former President of the United States who returned from the grave.

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im passing this on from a friend: 2 blondes walk into a building, you think one woulda saw it,

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Whats worse than it raining on your birthday? 911

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Q: How many different Pokèmon are there? A: Pokèmon aren't real.

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How did the little boy die? Malaria Why? He was poor. Why? A Jew stole his money.

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Why was the math text book so worried....… Because he had to many problems

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Knock knock Who's there? The interrupting doctor The interrupting doct... You have Cancer

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A dog walks into a bar, the dog is assisting his blind owner

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hey bruno ta quoi ds ta boite a lunch aujourdhui? DU SABLE CRISS DE POVRE!

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Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

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you cant spell slaughter withought laughter

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Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

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Q: What does one man with alzheimer's say to the other man with alzheimer's. A: Purple, because magic doesn't go through chickens.

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Roses are shut the f*** up. Violets are shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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