A man walks into a bar, and promptly leaves because he left his kid in the car.

An anti-Semite, a Jew and an American walked into the bar. The barman said: "Hi, Sara".

Two Chav's jump off a cliff who wins? Neither, the affects of gravity are equal despite the weight of said object.

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what its name is.

What's worse than shitting whilst fucking? Losing your eye! Kelvin Yang

What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

Why did the 60 y/o man take erectile dysfunction pills? His doctor prescribed them.

What disease did Harry Styles get? 1Infection! (if you don't know, Harry Styles is 1direction's manager)

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to escape the evil villains in giant mech suits.

I just got robbed by an invisible man!!!!

Knock Knock. Who's there? Come in! Come in who? I'm just com in' inside.

Fat? Jesse Z

What did the duck say to the Pope? Quack.

Chuck Norris was so famous we was casted for the show Walker, Texas Ranger

What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? I don't stab pizza 47 times in the chest with a chainsaw.

How many people can you fit in an oven? Six million, according to Hitler.

woman's lacrosse

Knock knock, COME IN!

Knock Knock? Who's there? Doctor Doctor Who? It is a science fiction show about a time traveller

Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

Q: What would Martin Luther King Jr. be if he was white? A: Alive

Big feet on a man means he has, Nothing, a man's foot size has no relation to the size of his penis.

Apple hates Blackberry.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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