What's better than winning the Special Olympics? ...Not being retarted.

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Did you see Helen Keller at the movie theater? I didn't either, she's dead.

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"Hey ask me if i'm fat" "Are you fat" "Leave me alone"

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

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Whats worst than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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I like it it the butt -Tyler James Nehring call me 863-670-1547

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- Wanna see a magic trick? - Sure - Too bad. I don't know any.

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YOLO

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Why did the two black men break into a bank with guns? It was being robbed by a white man and they were police officers.

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What did Hitler say to the Nazis? I have a mustache.

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What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

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What did little John get for his birthday? No sort of disease or illness of any kind because he was in perfect health. He also got an Xbox.

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He had a stroke.

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why did the dog cross the street? because it saw a squirrel

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Women are only good for seventy-one things: Love A proper home to come home to everyday 69

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A black person walked up to another black person, and tells him a pun the other black person laughs and walks away

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Why couldn't the bartender sell alcoholic beverages? He got fired

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When life gives you cancer, make cancerade.

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what did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware river? Get in the boat.

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What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A victim of an alcohol related car accident

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Why did the homeless man steal food from the local grocery store? He had not eaten in three days and was forced to steal or risk possible starvation.

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c-? men, C-men

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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